Co-parenting is hard during a “normal” routine but during the holidays it can be even more challenging. Here are some tips to keep in mind as you enter the holiday season.
Listen to your kids: This is not a time to tell your kids how they “should” feel or “fix” the situation. Kids want to feel heard just like us. Be fully engaged. Respond with empathy. Some great things to say are “That must be hard” or “I know that must be confusing” or ask them how they feel.
Make a plan..but be flexible: Make a visible calendar for your kids. This can be a shared google calendar for older children or a written calendar that is hung in the house for younger children. Communicate with your children often what the plan is however remember that last minute changes happen. Choose to be flexible even when it is hard. Keep in mind what is best for the children. Be creative with solutions.
Create new traditions while keeping some old traditions: This is a new season with a lot of changes. What are some traditions you have had that you want to keep and what are some you want to change up. Get your kids involved. If you always had a big Christmas breakfast but this year you won’t be together then maybe it a big Christmas dinner. Be creative and remember most traditions aren’t planned they just happen!
Make a budget and keep to it: It is so hard to not to compare yourself you co-parent or make purchases out of guilt. Make yourself a budget before you start shopping and stick with it. Your kids will remember how you spend time together not what gifts they received.
Take care of yourself: The holidays are overwhelming for most people. Remember you are in a new season filled with changes. It is important to take care of you so you can take care of your children. Take time to do things that bring you joy and bring you energy. Make a list of what these things are and implement them in your daily and weekly schedule. Include REST on your list.
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